All Blogged Out?

So here we are again. I've crawled back to the blogging world like the impudent hussy that I am. You probably hadn't noticed I'd gone.

Most people would have left the Internet for good following an extended run at something so vast as the London Olympics. Remember the Olympics? They were great, we all decided we preferred athletics to football for all of about a fortnight. This, of course, followed on from the blogging equivalent of Dante's Inferno, an horrendous journey through the Sixth Form hell of Higgsy's Blogsys. Shudder.

But I'm back. The most underwhelming return since Darren Carter went on trial at St. Andrew's at the start of the season.

My careers lady told me to start a blog. I've been suffering several crises of confidence recently, in terms of a career. I've opined upon scriptwriting- not enough ideas. I've pondered advertising- not enough like Mad Men. My Mum even suggested professional gambler- I'm the worst tipster in the world. Not even Arsenal's Invincibles would be safe from my accursed tipping.

Deep down, I think I still know at the bottom of my heart I want to live every male member of the Higgs family's dream and become a journalist.

So here I am. But what to actually blog on? Oh, what a question! There are so many Birmingham City-related blogs out there that it's difficult to come out with anything original. The same goes for sport in general, football especially.

I've discussed it with a housemate. I could combine my love of literature and football! I could compare Roberto Mancini to the Great Gatsby, keeping mediocre wingers in their packaging in his vast library of overpaid prima donnas! Alas, that was the only literary-football allusion I could think of.

I could analyse fictional characters! Why hasn't Mickey Mouse proposed to Minnie Mouse? Is he a commitment-phobe? Is there a problem with the pluralisation of their surnames? Or are they related? I think I'd struggle to fill a regular blog with those sorts of tenuous observations.

I could review films! Curses, someone's already got one of those blogs. And my attention span is infamously too short for films. I don't like films I have to concentrate on. (Still haven't watched Inception. Deal with it).

Eventually, after a good few hours of pondering what to write a blog on, where to find a niche, we joked I'd write one on 'what your choice of bread roll says about you'. Brown seedless- you maintain the illusion of healthiness but not enough to cut out carbs. Bloomer- soup fiend. One of those horrible ones that looks like it's got five o'clock shadow- you were too slow to get a nice one.

You laugh (you probably don't), but that was the best idea for a blog I had. Hence the title. Also, The Bread Roll Blog suggests that I'm avant garde, a little bit surrealist, quite Mighty Boosh in my writing.

I'm not.

But this blog may well turn out to be a trip into Surreal City. Who knows? I'm not tying myself down to a particular subject, so lord only knows where this Magical Mystery Tour might take me. I might even accuse another pop-star of being closely related to Satan. I'm not sure poor Noel-from-Hearsay's career ever recovered.